by Posterior Praiser
Ohtori Choutarou had been waiting all his life to hear the words 'I love you', but never really expected them to come from someone as...well as male as Shishido Ryou.
They had been living together in the school dorm for a while, and just recently shared their first kiss. It was awkward, but not unpleasant at all. Ohtori had thought that it might have been more enjoyable if Shishido-san had really been able to remember it afterward. But they would have more, right? So the first wasn't all that important in the long run he figured.
"I'm going to get some take out, Shishido-san. What would you like?" Ohtori felt arms wrap around his waist and a kiss on the back of his neck.
"Anything you want. Just don't be long." It was nice to share little moments with Shishido-san like that, especially after the years of confusion and denial. It was everything he had built up in his mind come true, and it was one of those things that made a person happy to be alive.
"I'll figure something out then. I'll be back soon." It was odd that even with all of the reasons in the world to be happy, he still felt like he was missing something. It was not that he didn't appreciate Shishido-san's attention, but he found that in the time since that first kiss, Shishido had been almost too attentive. He didn't seem like the type who would smother, but Ohtori was starting to get the impression that Shishido was not seeing who he really was at all, but rather a figment of who he had been wanting for years. And perhaps Ohtori was doing the same. He wasn't all that sure. He had always put Shishido above most other people, and came to acknowledge that he had a rather distorted view of the other, but he never thought of that as a bad thing.
He wasn't seeing the real Shishido Ryou, and never had.
The trip to the restaurant was a short one, and Ohtori picked up some cheap take out and headed back to the dorm. Had he really been so deluded this whole time? He didn't want to think that way, so he tried to push those thoughts to the back of his mind. A friendly face answered the door when he knocked to get back into the dorm. A face that was utterly clueless as to who he was.
"What did you get?"
"Ah, nothing too big. Just some shrimp stir fry and mushroom soup. It was the deal today." Shishido gave him a sideways glance before taking the bags out of Ohtori's hands and bringing them to the kitchen.
The two sat down to eat in silence. Ohtori listened to the clinking of chopsticks as they dug into the bowls they were eating from. He never noticed how much noise Shishido made when he was eating. The bowl was clanging. Shishido had very little table manners he realised, and was that…shovelling motion what he referred to as eating?
"Uh...Shishido-san?" Shishido looked up from his bowl.
"Eh? What is it Choutarou?"
"Uh ...It's nothing." No, it really wasn't nothing. He had never noticed these things before, so why now?
The dinner concluded in silence, and Ohtori found himself biting his lip to keep from yelling at Shishido to stop being such a pig, before walking to the living room and taking a seat on the couch to study. He had never noticed how blatantly annoying the other was until he had arrived home that evening. He didn't want to be anywhere near the older boy, never mind share a bed or anything else of that nature. He was too angry, but why was still a bit of a mystery...
"Choutarou?" Ohtori didn't even want to look in the direction of the voice.
"What is it?"
"I hate mushrooms and I hate shrimp. I thought you knew that, so why did you bring that back for dinner?" An outright attack from a person who was too lazy to get his own dinner. Ohtori was fuming.
"No I didn't know that. You never told me. You always bought your own food, and made me dinner."
"I only did that cause you can't cook worth a damn."
"What?! This coming from someone who could burn water!" Ohtori stood up from the couch., and faced the other, looking down upon him in an attempt to appear intimidating. He was not just going to let that slide. Who did he think he was anyway? They'd been doubles partners an friends for years and he waits until now to reveal the kind of jerk he really is?
"You're a pig, you know that? And you're stuck up too!"
"Ha! You act like you're better than everyone else, with your faked innocence."
"How would you know!? You never even bothered to get to know the real me, only the me you wanted to know about!"
"Then why the hell have you been putting up with me for 5 years, you bastard!"
"Because I love you, you jerk!" Okay, that didn't come out quite right did it? Shishido's expression softened slightly.
"Then what the hell are we fighting about?" Ohtori didn't really have an answer to that question at all. Why was he so angry at Shishido-san? Maybe he was just angry at himself for not seeing who the other really was, and for pretending that he was perfect. There was no such thing as perfect, and Ohtori felt like a fool for ever falling into that trap in the first place.
"I...I don't know why we're fighting…"
"Choutarou...I'm sorry." Ohtori stiffened at the statement. What did Shishido have to be sorry about?
"It's... not your fault." Ohtori knew that it wasn't easy for the other to apologise, so it meant even more that he was swallowing his pride in an attempt to mend broken fences.
"I always seem to mess things up, so whatever it is your pissed off about is probably my fault, so I figure I should say I'm sorry so that you might forgive me." Why did Ohtori hate this person again? It was not as if he'd done anything wrong. He was just being himself, and Ohtori had to get to know who that was exactly, since his whole knowledge of Shishido was hazed with past idealism.
"I'm sorry too Shishido-san. I just don't know what to think anymore. You...are not who I thought you were. I guess that doesn't make any sense anyway, does it?" A kiss interrupted his thoughts, and Ohtori knew that Shishido understood.
"Yeah...that makes perfect sense. I thought the same thing actually..." Ohtori smiled. If they understood each other, and felt the same way, then there was no need for argument. Things had already been decided.
A hand stretched out, reaching toward Ohtori's
"I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Shishido Ryou."
"I'm Ohtori Choutarou. It's nice to meet you." A smile and a hand taking his...
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